Thank you for all the great comments regarding my last post!
Today I feel at peace for doing everything I could to find my birth mother. Four different sources in the past two years came up with the same person, including my own research. I made the phone call and it wasn't her.
The blessing came when the Beverly that answered the phone was so kind. She had such an understanding voice. It was in this moment that something profound happened. A revelation that I really loved my birth mother and my birth mother loved me. Also, I feel even more blessed to have a wonderful Mom (adopted). She loves me and I love her.
I am ready to change "my story." To change the negative scripts of my life to positive ones. I have allowed myself from time to time to think of myself as an orphan waiting for someone to rescue me. I have been rescued, I have been redeemed. It is time to live fully in this "story."
10 comments:
That's a great perspective!
Your loss is so profound. It takes amazing courage and faith to get to where you are now. It's okay to mourn your losses when you need to.
Dear David:
I am the person who did the latest research for Linda. She and I have been friends since we were 15 years old and wanted to do the search for you, too. I am sorry that you got your hopes up - it did look as we had found your birth mother, Beverly. You might say that I have gotten somewhat obsessed with finding her, once I started the search. Only God knows what has happened to Beverly and if she is still alive. Hopefully, He will reveal to you all the "mystery" but, until He does, I am confident that He will continue to give you peace.
Yours In Christ,
Kathie K.
Kathie,
Thank you for sharing that with me! I really think if she could have been found, we would have found her. Thank you again for all your help. Blessings.
David you show amazing strength and I know God has great things in store for you.
Oh David, that sounds so good. That you are ready to live fully in this story. I am so glad that you feel this love for you birth mother and that she loved you. That seemed apparent to us on the outside but the enemy clouds our vision of what we personally need so often. I am thankful for journey and so thankful that you have shared it.
Dear El Beasto De Pan Grande,
Thank you for bringing to my attention that Matt needs to treat Melissa with more dignity. We have worked on it about 18 years of his 21 years, so anything that you can say to him that may help would be appreciated. However, he has impoved greatly over the past few years. "Sibling rivalry" has quite abated.
As far as the bills, "help is on the way." And yes, it would help if he got a job, however, he needs to find something that fits his schedule better than the night time security job he had last semester that created a sleep deprevation problem. El Beasto, if you are independently wealthy, maybe you could donate a few bucks to his cause. Blessings -- Matt and Melissa's Dad
From looking at the BIG BEAST'S weblog, he has some anger management issues.
Your comment was right on and I will pray for him, whoever he is.
Would you call that a weblog drive-by?
David: To the degree that it is possible, I feel your pain! Thank you for being so transparent with your thoughts and feelings! I pray that the Lord will give you a profound sense of His peace as you struggle with the fact that your birth mother is likely "gone". May He give you strength to press on during this time of sadness and loss. I'll be praying for you, David!
Because I care,
The "other" David
Hi David. Thank you for keeping this blog and sharing this process. You've become a good friend and a true inspiration. Resilient, honest and strong.
I think it is time for me to change "My Story" too.
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